It's late, quiet, and empty here. I'm deep in the middle of producing a video and feeling lonely.
Here's the story:
Finals week at Oregon Tech wrung my brain out as I fell in a car, took off to the air, and woke up in
Texas.
I had only the opportunity to shake hands with all the staff once. Armed with a flexed face, I greeted campers the next day and they kept coming for 4 weeks. As a media director, I was often on the verge of tripping, keeping my eye set on the Holy Spirit. I centered the project around my own need for guidance.
The goal of my work was to nurse our infant media program to be able to change the Episcopal Diocese of Dallas as we know it...no pressure.
All right after engineering finals! No time to plan! Imagine.
I tell the story dramatically to drop mouths and feel impressive. There hasn't been a day that's passed by where I have legitimately felt qualified or prestigious, though. Often, I acted out of necessity and desperation and maybe love for the people instead of experience and wisdom. I was glad to be respected and supported by the staff in good faith. I thrived, I got tired, I'm asleep.
The season's over.
Here's a list of what I did:
1. I learned about drinking water and sweat.
2. I smiled a lot.
3. I prayed.
4. I got to hug around 20 people a day.
5. I never took my swim test.
6. I made 4 okay slideshows.
7. I made 1 good video.
8. I met one really inspired group of kids.
Let's come back to those open mouths. In particular, I drew admiration from always remaining positive. Positive energy is more sparse since the staff left camp and work has started on post-production. I was allowed to love because they loved me first. I kept loving because they were present to be loved.
John talked about that. "We love because He first loved us." (John 4:19). My aunt was telling me about that. There's been enough of my life building up my ego. Here raises a new idea.
I was met with love, and so I was allowed to be the biggest love Riley O'Boyle is capable of.
I haven't felt like I've had anything worthwhile to share for a long time.
But then I read this girl's blog. She went to a coffee shop and just wrote her fog away.
The simplicity of the act baffles me some days. Sometimes it's just there.
I'm alone, awake, and thriving in all this creation. My emotions are playing this video and these keys like strings, and all the tension and pressure is just making that beautiful noise.
This beautiful noise.
UGH.
I'm only writing this to appeal to some greater crowd.
Practicing the amateur journalism I planted a year back.
Can I write what I mean and still expect to reach some greater conclusion?
That's it, right?
I want to sell that conclusion.
That
great
big
thesis.
Here: Love.
That's it, here's my one more unique presentation.
By loving, you are inviting people to love you.
When you are loved, you are invited to love back.
Also,
It is more blessed to give than to receive. So give love.
Why? Because it's better to get then to have, and so it must also be better to have given then to give.
Does that make sense? I'm playing with an old Calvin and Hobbes parable.
I grew up on those.
Can [this freaking spacing]
I name it in one other way? Yeah, love also liberates.
Oh my gosh, when you are loved, you have been given permission to
LIBERATE PEOPLE.
THAT IS WHAT I LOVE. I love that LOVE IS LIBERTY'S LANCE.
LOVE HURTS.
LOVE IS HARD.
LOVE IS POKEY.
LOVE IS KEYS.
LOVE IS AMERICA.
Don't we all carry around personal shackles? Self-inflicted or otherwise?
We have the power to free people. We can take their shackles off.
How inspired.
You've got my words for this evening. I'm pleased with my own tone about it.
I look forward to writing about Ireland as the days approach.
The fog blog that inspired me.
http://daniellebarozinsky.wordpress.com/2014/07/17/saying-hello/
